Overdue commendation can create pressure for success and fear of error. Psychologicalism suggests a more helpful way to encourage children and help them believe in their abilities

Each parent wants his child to grow up with confidence, to feel capable, and to have no fear of challenges. That’s why, words like you’re the smartest, you can do anything or you’re the best heard in the family.

Despite love and a desire to encourage their child, such commendation does not always produce the outcome that parents expect.

When a child is constantly praised for his intelligence, talent, or superiority over others, he can develop the conviction that he must always be successful in meriting recognition.

Rather than enjoying the learning process, he may begin to avoid difficult tasks for fear of failing his parents.

Why is it important to commend our child?

Children who are taught to receive praise only for their wisdom or ability may experience failure as evidence of their failure.

For example, a child who constantly hears that he is the smartest in class may feel insecure when facing a task that he cannot handle.

Therefore, it is important to help children to see that their abilities are developed through exercise, effort, and experience.

This does not mean that parents should stop praising their children. Rather, commendation can be most beneficial when they focus on progress, perseverance, and the way a child faces challenges.

Foto: Queenmoonlit35

What do you say to your child instead of him?

Instead of general commendation, parents can use expressions that appreciate practical efforts.

Instead you’re very smart, you can say: I liked the way you tried to find a solution.

Instead you’re the best, try: I see how much you’ve made.

And instead of “Ty everything goes hand in hand,” you might say: You didn’t give up, even though it was hard.

These messages help your child to understand what has contributed to his success and move him to try again when he does not succeed immediately.

Praise Him Even When He Does Not Win

When a child gets a poor grade, loses a race, or fails to accomplish what he wants to do, parents often try to comfort him by saying that he is still the best.

But it may be most helpful to first accept disappointment.

The word that I understand you’re upset or what do you think we can do differently next time?

It is important for a child to realize that mistakes and losses do not diminish his value as a person.

Parents ‘ support should not depend on grades, victories or results, but on love and unconditional acceptance.

Self – confidence is not built up by being always the best

The purpose is, not to be proud of his own abilities, but to learn that his value is not determined by comparison.

A child who feels accepted even when wrong has more room to try new things, face challenges, and develop emotional stability.

Finally, the most important message that parents can convey is simple: You do not always need to be the best to be valuable and loving. /Telegraphy/